Poems by Joni Poole

Shattered
Joni Nicole Poole
April 15, 2008

I remember that day
I remember the pain
I remember the guilt and the shame

Time seemed to stop
As I fell to your power
Belittled in shame

Fear pulsed through my body
My life flashed before my eyes
I would have rather been dead,
Than be in your presence

Once
I had trusted you
I had even looked up to you
However, That has been shattered
Along with so much more

You forced yourself upon me
You didn't ask
If you had,
I still would have said No

When I realized what was about to happen
I told you No
I asked you to let me go
I know you heard me
But, you still didn't listen

I didn't want this
But did I have a choice?
Unlike me
You had a choice,
And you made it

You stole something from me
You took something I wanted to save
You took the one thing I could never get back

That day the child in me died
I hope you're happy
You ruined my life.

One Doubtful Soul
Joni Nicole Poole
April 30, 2008

As I look at the world around me
It changes each and every day
As crimes worsen
Morals dwindle out
What once was bad
I now accept
So now days
People push things to the side
They try not to notice what really happened,
What will happen
And
What shouldn't happen

Each day twelve people make a decision
Punish or Not to punish
It takes all twelve to make one vote
But,
One Doubtful Soul
Can change it all
One Doubtful Soul
Can destroy lives of many

That One Doubtful Soul
Does not want to believe
What horrible things someone could do
To a Child,
To a Teen,
To an Adult,
To the Elderly,
Age, Gender, Race,
It makes no difference
But that One Doubtful Soul tells itself
Things like this don't really happen

Due to this One Doubtful Soul
Thousand of cases get thrown out
Thousands of crimes go unpunished
Thousands of times justice is not served
Thousands more regular people become victims
All thanks,
To One Doubtful Soul.

What's Next?
Joni Nicole Poole
April 20, 2008

I made a decision
To tell the truth
About what happened to me
And the abuse

With one phone call
My life would change
I told my mom
Late one night in that parking range

Tears poured out
As we stood in the dark
My emotions crumbled before her
For he had surely left his mark

Days passed by
Court dates came
Nothing was done
And I was to blame
Or so it seemed

I looked back
On these past few months
I look to the future and wonder
What's Next?

My Trial?!?
Joni Nicole Poole
April 9, 2008

How much more can one person take?
Sitting in a small room
Full of emotions, tears, and shame
She listens to how they morph her words
She hears how she is wrong
She hears the many lies
But, she holds herself together
And tries to be strong.

Many days like this have come and gone
And many more are expected
Her nerves try to get the best of her

As she sits at the table
Looking straight forward
But never to her left
For looking left will bring her back to reality
Back to the hurt and the pain
Looking left, she will remember back
So she looks forward
She says a prayer
And hopes for the best

The doubt still dwindles in her mind
But she puts it to the side
She grits her teeth
And prepares herself
For the trial of her life.

No Probable Cause
Joni Nicole Poole
April 11, 2008

I try to think
How you came to your decision
I hoped that you would be my savior
You heard the arguments,
Those many times.

With few questions asked
And few words spoken
You made your decision,
And my heart was broken.

I wonder what made you believe
With evidence laid before you
And with three testimonies,
I wondered how you could say
No probable cause.

Oh these words cut through my heart
No probable cause
How could you say that?
I still want to know
How you made that decision,
I still want to know

I just wanted justice,
I wanted answers,
But, all I got was
No probable cause.

Two Steps Forward, One Step back
Joni Nicole Poole
April 11, 2008

Looking back to yesterday
Or what now seems like yesterday
I see my supporters, my family
Behind me they stood,
Ready to fight.
We went back to that dreadful small room,
We sat and listened,
We wondered in amazement.
One man could change our lives
Hanging on his ever last word
Life seeming to dwindle away,
As we looked to our silver haired elder,
To make the call
Also we looked to him,
For hope
For strength
For an answer
Just by being in the presence of that one man
I myself had taken two steps forward
And with his decision
I took one step back.

The Real Me
Joni Nicole Poole
April 30, 2008

I look at my writings
Poems and Stories
What I have written
I see it lying here before me
My art,
My words,
A piece of myself
In each stroke of lead
A piece of my heart and soul
That no one sees
But me
On the paper
Each an individual work of art
Crafted by me
I read it and I see
All the emotions that I feel
I see it all right here before me
Others I dare not let read
I don't want them to know
The one behind the mask
The Real Me.

My Last Stand
Joni Nicole Poole
November 18, 2008

My last stand,
Two months ago,
Long and agonizing as I sat there

The wooden box of torment,
Cold and lonely
As I sat there peering out,
Wanting to leave
Feeling nauseated,
Scared,
And Vulnerable...

I was asked so many questions
Personal,
Confusing,
Inappropriate,
But they were all questions
I had to answer.

I took my time,
Seemed like forever
Tears fell,
My anger rose,
I was all emotions
At once.

Looking back,
It would be hard to return
And do again
I fear that place,
But,
I know,
I stood strong
I hung in there
And that was
My last Stand.